Integrity. Why integrity? Because it is one of the pylons that make things and life work smoothly.
Integrity is the state of being whole: each part is in harmony with all the others, all “stand.” When we talk about our integrity as persons, we refer to deeds, words, thoughts, self.
Am I honest with those around me?
Am I honest with myself?
Am I honest with my Self and Soul?
The easiest path is to start with what is obvious and measurable. Thus, relations with the others are a good mirror of how integer we are. It is a potentially brutal and tough mirror, if we do not like what we see, but it is surely a good place to start with.
Integrity towards others
1. Do not promise what you know from the start that you will not do. For example, parents often lie to their children, promising them various things – “I will buy you that toy some other time,” even though they do not intend to keep their promise. It erodes the others’ trust in us.
2. Do what you promised to do, when you promised that you will do it. Punctuality and respecting deadlines will make you a partner desired and appreciated, and you will feel more energetic and able to play ever bigger games. When we do not respect what we promise, we make place inside our mind to the “parent” – that small voice in our head used to evaluate, judge and punish inappropriate behaviour.
If you look at the face of a person who is late, you can see that they are not present, is preoccupied with thoughts of low vibration that sabotages the life quality. If you want to be peaceful and with your peace of mind, respect the assumed deadlines.
3. Do what you promised, at the promised quality level or even better. Excellence attracts excellence. If you are a master in your activity, others who aspire to be the best will look for your company, and thus you will easily have team you do not have to motivate, they motivate themselves from the inside, out of the wish of being of high performance.
When you deliver something even better than said, people are charmed and that state feeds the relations you have. Even when you cook for your family, giving little more attention to the way you place it on the plate or some surprise dessert will make them glad and surprise the dear ones in a pleasant way.
There are obviously situations when you cannot, with the best intentions, do what you promised.
In that moment, inform. Communicate immediately what you do, apologize, assure the other that you are aware of the possible impact of the fact that you cannot deliver and offer solutions. Not one, three!
Take time and think how you could nevertheless do what you promised, even if by other persons or some other time. If you realize that you can do it yourself, but later, suggest a new deadline and see if it is approved. If not, who else does what you do? Who could do it instead of you, equally well, the same thing? Or maybe even better? Communicate the solutions and let them choose. But if you or something else cannot do it, apologize and assume the consequences.
They can be or not, depending on the situation, but do not project guilt or shame on anyone. It is only life and life is unpredictable and it is OK when at times it happens in a different way than we planned. Such situations help you become flexible and creative, appreciate their value, without judging or invalidating yourself.
Practice 59| YOU ARE WHAT YOU SEEK TO BECOME – Extracted from my book, Rediscover Your Radiance